Bra

This really might be an overshare but heck, I've never had any shame in my game, why would I start now. This is hands down the BEST sports bra I've ever ever ever owned.
Seriously. I'm a big chested gal and in the past I've never felt comfortable running or jumping if not for the self conscious factor than simply for the reason that it HURT.
I got this bra and it's my new best friend. Seriously. It keeps everything in place and since it's a racing back style I never have to worry about straps falling down. Now I can run and jump and do whatever I need to do without concern of pain from floppy boobs!
http://www.titlenine.com/product/313801.do?kwd=tHE+LAST+RESORT+BRA

Twin Lights

Two years ago I rented a bike and did this bike event and it was quite possibly the most frustrating, crappy bike experience I've ever had.
http://www.bikenewyork.org/ride/twin-lights-ride/
The bike seat was way too low but I was truly too green to know how to fix it so I rode with it

and within the first 10 minutes of the ride you run into hills from hell.

I felt defeated before I'd even had a chance to get started.
I want to do it again.
Part of my brain is saying
"ARE YOU OUT OF YOUR GODDAMN MIND WOMAN?!"
but the stubborn part of me who knows how hard I'm working on my legs these days knows that if I do it again it will be completely and totally different.
It's not till September and that gives me plenty of time and rides to work on my hills and my legs.
I hate feeling like I didn't get to really do it and feel that hating on the ride isn't giving it a fair chance.
We will see

Competition

Part of what I love about Hoboken Boot Camps is the lack of competitive spirit in class and that there are no judgements. Each of us supports the rest and none of us focuses on what others are doing in class. We are all just trying to survive and push ourselves the best we can.

The competitive aspect for me has been so absent that when it shows up it confuses me and feels really out of place.
I've noticed one fellow student seems to be a total type A personality and she seems happiest when she's the fastest, strongest, gal with the most stamina in our classes.
I wouldn't have any issues with her except I seem to bring out this side of her.

I grab a bell, she grabs heavier. Today during our work with the tension bands she was working with a black band (more tension, harder to work with) and I grabbed a red band. When questioned about her band choice and informed she could go to red if she was struggling, she looked right at me and said
"Red bands are for weak folks"

When we were working with dumbells and I had a 12 pound the whole class and she had switched to a 20 pound she informed someone that she switched because
"the 12 pounders don't really offer a challenge"

I do one handed swings with the Kettlebells. Up until recently she did two handed swings. Today she's across from me doing one handed swings. (I usually switch hands at the top of my swing but lately I've been doing 5 swings, and then switching hands. If she starts to do this I will be forced to take it to the other side of the studio to get away from her.)

I don't know. It could all be in my head but I really feel a weird vibe off this gal. She just gives off this very cold, standoffish, superior aura and it's not much fun to be around.
I've actually taken my Kettlebell and gone to the other side of the studio so I'm not near her.
She's not going to push me to heavier weights or get me to move faster. I'm gonna focus on me and doin my thing as I always have.

I'm not a competitive soul. I'd much rather cheer you on from the sidelines than try to best you in a competition.
I'm secure in who I am and what I can and cannot do and I know that the ability to swing the 40 pound Kettlebell does not make anyone a better person than I am.

I know that I can swing and lift the 70 plus pound Kettlebell and I can carry the 100+ pound monster truck tire across the studio and I've pushed all 220 pounds of David on the sled and have given Linda and Jess piggyback rides so if you want to think you are stronger than I am, groovy on you.

See? That. That right there is what I DO NOT want to do and what I've never felt I had to do. I've never had to compare and justify my accomplishments to anyone and yet here, I've just gone and done it.  DAMN IT.

I won't lie. I'm really crazy proud of how strong I am and how strong I'm working on becoming. I'm really proud of what I can do that lots of gals who come to class can't do but I'm also totally aware that 90% of the gals I take class with kick my ass in the aerobic department. That's cool with me!

I push me because I want to best me and compete only with me. I've learned from 2+ years of working with David that I have to work smarter not harder. I've learned that just because I can, doesn't mean I should or that I have to.

That I don't have to and that no one cares what I can or cannot do is part of the reason I know I can. No one judges and that environment allows me the freedom to feel no shame when I push myself and fail the first time around.

More than one person has commented to David how they saw me in class they assumed I was some short, fat chick who had no business being there and then when they watched me in class they realized how strong I am and how I can totally keep up with what everyone is doing and then some.

Maybe that's why she's weird towards me? Because her first impression and the truth didn't match up? Who the hell knows. I'll never know and I don't really care much.

If this weird whatever she's got going on causes her to give it all she's got with each class then that's fantastic. I'm all for it then. If my being in the same class with you causes you to lift heavier, swing harder, run faster and leave it all on the floor at the end of class than you are more than welcome to  form whatever you want to in your head about me.

It's just funny that she's chosen to compete with me, the one really non competitive person in the whole room.