Sunday, August 21, 2011


So let me discuss how I'm attemping to digest my failure with dignity and grace and a grownup outlook but the disapointed little girl in me just wants to throw herself on the ground and kick and scream and cry.

I did not pass the Certification. I ran out of gas somewhere during the right arm set of the 30 snatches.
These are my hand tears. I'm actually insanely proud of them and how hard I had to work to earn them. Click the photo to enlarge and see them in all their yucky glory.

I walk away with a whole lotta hand tears and a ton of new techniques and information and an even deeper love of the sport of Kettlebell.

I'm insanely glad I was a part of this event but I'm frustrated that not only could I not finish the test today but that I'm the only one who took it and didn't pass.
That's really really hard to swallow.

Yes, this reaction is completely ego driven but I'm cool with that.

It's also frustrating that I know I put that Kettlebell down only when I had absoutely nothing left. I gave up only when my arm couldn't do anything more. To know that the best I had today wasn't even close to enough is also a blow to the ego.

To know that at the end when Ken was telling everyone he would mail them their certificates and when he said "For those of you who didn't pass" he was speaking only to me is a blow to the ego.

Yes, I'd been working hard all weekend, yes my back was injured but at the end of the day the bottom line is I couldn't finish. I didn't have the strength.

Yes, of course I worked really hard today and yes, of course I'm going to rest and submit my test via video to the IKFF but it sort of feels like getting my GED or failing your driving test first time out. I didn't graduate with the rest of the kids.

I'm spending the rest of today being frustrated at myself and tomorrow I will go at it all again with a renewed fire in my belly and next week when my hands are healed and my muscles are rested I will have David video my test and I will rock it and send  it to the IKFF and I will get my Certification.

No comments: