Monday, June 6, 2011

Fear & Limitations

Yesterday we did the NYC Walk Now For Autism Event for Autism Speaks with my walk team "Team Brian The Lion"
This is my oldest son who is not on the Autism Spectrum. He is the most rockin 7 1/2 year old kid on the entire planet.

As I was standing on line a guy handed me a card promoting an upcoming bike ride for Autism.

I was super excited. A NYC bike event that benefits Autism Speaks? Holy Smokes I'm so there I'm not even here anymore!!!

Then I noticed the name of the event..."Bridges Ride for Autism" and my heart sank a bit. Maybe it wasn't ALL bridges. Maybe it was just one and then a flat-ish ride.

I went home and checked out the event website
Begin at the Seaport.
Then go over:

  •  Brooklyn Bridge
  • Manhattan Bridge
  • Williamsburg Bridge
  • Pulaski Bridge
  • Queensboro Bridge

Return South Street Seaport…you did it!
My immediate reaction?
"No freakin way I can do that."
This ride is ALL hills and not nice easy hills. Mean long hills that make you rethink your love of bike riding kind of hills. (At least they are for this hill hatin momma)

As I was soaking in a tub my mind wandered back to the ride. Autism Speaks is my pet charity. It's an organization that has been there for me since my son was diagnosed as being on the spectrum.
In the three plus years I've been involved for them I've raised close to $5,000 and feel that that doesn't even come close to enough to thank them for all the resources, contacts, support, information and acceptance I've received from them.

Was the fact that this ride has some hills going to keep me from an event that benefits these amazing people and this amazing group?
How small minded and fearful was I?! How hard was my self confidence lacking?! The ride isn't for another month! Why that's plenty of time to get my gams into better shape to do this ride and take on (or attempt to take on) every single hill that is put in my path.

Above all that though, here was another opportunity to push myself and set a goal that was currently out of reach and unobtainable. How proud of myself would I be if I attempted this ride?! How cool would it be if I were able to make it over one or two of the bridges without dismounting?!

I think I might have to sign up...

1 comment:

sassy said...

Wow. I can understand where you conflicting emotions come from. I'm not good with hills yet have an autistic daughter! I would probably do the ride and walk up those darn hills if I needed to.
It's about the spirit:)